Getting started on the path to a happy honeymoon is not always easy. So, I was thrilled for this mom and her soon-to-be-married daughter who had a really positive premarital medical exam experience! Here’s their story:
Times sure have changed. I was pleasantly surprised for my daughter to have such a great experience with her premarital physical exam. The doctor took us back to his office and talked very openly, comfortably and bluntly about sex. He maintained great eye contact with my daughter, and carefully read her responses to make sure she was okay with all the information he was giving her.He started off the discussion with birth control options. Then told her he wanted to talk very bluntly with her about sex. He began by giving her tips on dealing with the discomfort she may experience having sex for the first time. He explained the average size discrepancies between a penis and a virginal vagina. He encouraged her to talk to her husband about what she was feeling and what she needed from him and to tell him to go slow and take his time. He covered the use of KY Jelly–lots of it–and not to rush things. I was so impressed with his candor.
Then he started talking about the female orgasm, which I thought was so awesome of him to do, because I felt like it set my daughter up for success in her sexual relationship with her new husband.
He described how men and women are very different in their sexual responses. He talked about how women need more external stimulation of the clitoris using hands or vibrators, etc. He was funny in telling her to make sure to teach her husband about this right off, because otherwise he would probably not know what he needs to be doing.
I thought it was great that he asked her if she knew where her clitoris was, and she said she thought so. He told her that during the physical exam that he would touch it very briefly to show her where it was because otherwise she might not know. He explained how the clitoris is extremely sensitive, almost too sensitive unless touched with the clitoral hood down.I sat there in amazement about all the stuff she was learning that I so wish I would have known before my honeymoon!! She can now teach her cute little husband, so that they can have a happy honeymoon and successful sexual future. He urged her to try to climax as soon as she could on the honeymoon or as soon thereafter as possible so that it would become a habit allowing her to associate great pleasure in her physical relationship with her husband.
During her exam, he showed her where her clitoris was, which sort of sounds like it would have been very awkward, but it was done so tastefully, and he was so comfortable and straightforward about it that it was actually a great experience. When I asked my daughter if the clitoris was where she thought it was, she replied with a very surprised “NO! Not at all!”
I am so grateful that he was so thorough and straightforward about such important things. I left feeling so thankful that she is going into marriage with great knowledge and especially great confidence in her sexuality. I hope all young women are having such a great premarital exam with their doctors. I only wish that my daughter’s soon-to-be-husband would have been there. That would have been really great for both of them.
- Honeymoon Resources
- Premarital Prep Resources
- ARTICLE — Don’t Forget the Honeymoon! by Laura M. Brotherson, Meridian Magazine
- ARTICLE — Transitioning to Sexual Intimacy — UVU Sex Survey Results