Porn is the world’s worst sex educator!
Many young people, especially, seem to think of porn as a good “go-to” for sex education since they often feel like there’s nowhere else to go. There are too few places for young people to go (or anyone, for that matter) to have an intelligent, rational, respectful discussion about it.
The topic of sex often feels inaccessible and taboo (even “healthy sexuality” within marriage) and has relegated the entire subject to an awkward, uncomfortable, anxiety-inducing, and distant “corner.” My hope is to provide alternative sex education sources that are safe, healthy, respectful, and trustworthy for those trying to understand God’s designs for human sexuality.
There are myriad reasons porn is a terrible sex educator. To help spread the word to any who still think there is any redeeming value in porn, here are just a few of the reasons you definitely don’t want to turn to porn for any kind of a healthy education about sex or real lovemaking:
- 1) Porn sex isn’t real. Porn does not portray healthy, real-life sexual relationships where respect for differing male/female sexual wiring and arousal patterns are respected and attended to for mutual enjoyment.
- 2) Warps sexpectations. Pornography instills unrealistic expectations about sex and about male and female bodies. It encourages unhealthy practices and desires that non-pornified individuals are not likely to want to do.
- 3) Increases liberal attitudes. Pornography consumption increases liberal attitudes about sexual practices including outside-of-marriage sex.
- 4) Normalizes misogyny and sexual abuse. The treatment of women and others as sexual objects to be used for one’s pleasure is a strong theme “taught” throughout pornography.
- 5) Decimates the sacredness of sexuality. Pornography decimates the sacredness of sexuality as designed solely for the intimate relationship within marriage including the mental, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of healthy sexuality.
In the absence of healthy sex education sources and good guides to developing a healthy sexuality, people turn to porn. Where might we instead go for good sex education? Ideally, we can turn to parents, married friends and family, but even with that most will still need good godly books on the subject like my 3 books shared below (and other good books like it) since most people are either under-educated about healthy sexuality or woefully educated by pornography in need of remedial education! Don’t be fooled into thinking pornography can or will help you out in the healthy sexuality department!!
- From Honeymoon to Happily Ever After: 23 Keys to Prepare for a Sextraordinary Marriage (2019)
- Knowing HER Intimately: 12 Keys for Creating a Sextraordinary Marriage (2016)
- And They Were Not Ashamed — Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment (2004)
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Additional references:
- https://www.strengtheningmarriage.com/effects-of-porn/
- http://thefrankchat.com/blog/2016/7/5/porn-is-a-bad-teacher
- https://www.teenvogue.com/story/porn-is-not-sex-ed
- https://www.elevatustraining.com/has-pornography-become-the-go-to-sexuality-educator-for-our-youth-part-1-and-2/
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-about-sex/201208/the-real-problem-porn-its-bad-sex
- https://fightthenewdrug.org/see-how-many-students-use-porn-to-learn-about-sex/