Want to know how to fix your spouse?! This is the key! Fix yourself! That’s what brings about change in your spouse. Couples spend a lot of time trying to fix their spouse, but it’s not terribly effective and causes a lot of personal frustration and relationship stress. In this Marriage Message #003 — Focus on Fixing Yourself, Laura M. Brotherson shares some insights to help you avoid this common trap.
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Marriage Message Episode #003 link –
https://youtu.be/PoR3oruYQvg
Strengthening Marriage YouTube channel link —
http://www.youtube.com/user/StrengthenMarriage
Related Resources
About the Author: Laura M. Brotherson, LMFT, CST, CFLE
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and Certified Sex Therapist, Laura M. Brotherson is the founder of "The Marital Intimacy Institute" with a mission to help couples create "sextraordinary" marriages. She counsels with couples and individuals in private practice (and online) and is passionate about helping couples navigate the intricacies of intimacy--specializing in healthy sexuality, sex therapy, and sex addiction. She is the author of the best-selling book And They Were Not Ashamed — Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment, Knowing HER Intimately: 12 Keys for Creating a Sextraordinary Marriage, and her latest book --From Honeymoon to Happily Ever After: 23 Keys to Prepare for a Sextraordinary Marriage. As a Certified Family Life Educator, Laura is also actively engaged in helping to build strong marriages and families by providing marriage education through Couples Cruises, articles, newsletters, radio and television broadcasts, "The Marital Intimacy Show" podcasts, and presenting at conferences and workshops. Laura is a regular contributor to the KSL Television "Studio 5" morning show.
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Laura,
You mentioned in the Q&A that it was your husband’s “unending patience” with you that played a large role in your ability to open up and figure things out. How did he exhibit this patience? Was it what he said (or didn’t’ say)? Did he not bring up his own sexual needs unless you did? I’m in it for the long haul and I don’t know how I need to be patient for my wife; she doesn’t respond well to pressure and some things I do to try to help unintentionally ADD more pressure than if I had done nothing. For example, in the past I’ve offered to only have sex when she wants it, but she told me that she would feel pressure of initiating and that she felt like it was shifting all responsibility over to her.
So . . . I’m working on fixing myself. I know I need to she her patience, but how? What do I do?
Correction: I know I need to sSHOW her patience, but how?