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We welcome your comments about our books and CDs, this website, our newsletters, and author events, etc. If you would like to post a question for feedback or discussion, please post it on our "Open Forum 3 Discussions" page at "Laura's Strengthening Marriage Blog."
I just had to tell you something fun! My husband has Wednesday's off work, so we call it "Whoopee Wednesday." The other day things were different...in a real good way! I asked him what the deal was and he said he'd been reading your website and such. I happily told him to keep it up. Thanks for your work in providing intimate insights for our marriage!
Subject:
Variety adds Vitality
Date:
February 18 2010
Name:
Jen
Comments:
Laura,
I've been reading AND THEY WERE NOT ASHAMED and the section that mentions adding music while making love really intrigued me. My husband and I are newly-weds and have very much benefitted from what we've learned so far. I'm not sure if other girls have had this same issue but I've stayed away from most music because I don't like to wade through the muck. I think it'd be fun to add music but I don't imagine the Mormon Tabernacle Choir or Hilary Weeks would be very romantic. Any suggestions for where to look? Thank-you so much!
Subject:
Thanks for changing our lives
Date:
February 16 2010
Comments:
My wife and I have read your book twice now,"And They Were Not Ashamed." We have been working together now for about 8 months trying to improve our marriage. You and your book have helped us work through several problems that had kept us in a parallel marriage for 26 years. We are now happier than we have ever been together and feel closer and more unified than I even thought possible. Thank you for your work and your straight forward clear approach to sexual matters. You have truly changed our lives.
Subject:
In reply to Bill Bonner "Valentine's Day Celebrations"
Date:
February 14 2010
Name:
Laura M. Brotherson
Comments:
Hello Bill Bonner--What an amazing coincidence that we both chose the same place to spend our Valentine's date with our spouses. That was my husband and me at that hotel restaurant. My husband thought it was incredibly curious that someone would come up to us and ask us if we were the "Brothers." I replied that we were the "Brothersons." We did have a wonderful romantic getaway for the evening and hope you and your wife did as well. Thanks for coming up to say hi! Laura
Subject:
Valentine's Day Celebrations
Date:
February 14 2010
Name:
Bill Bonner
Comments:
Last night (Saturday) my wife and I of 46 years decided to share a intimate dinner at the Courtyard by Marriott on Eagle at Overland in Meridian. We arrived to find that a number of other couples (and a few families) had the same idea. As we were being shown to our table we passed an attractive young couple, who looked exactly like you and Kevin. I had never met either of you, and I blurted out, "Are you the Brothers?" The young woman looked confused and said "No," and we went on by (I rather sheepishly, having been so gauche and also discombobulated that I had mis-called your name). We had a great meal and a good time recalling old times and new reasons to celebrate our relationship that continues to evolve. If it was indeed you, I hope that you had a good time and will accept my apologies. It were not you, I do hope that the couple had a very good and romantic evening. Bill
Subject:
Your podcasts
Date:
February 11 2010
Comments:
I just wanted to tell you how I am just hungry for these podcasts. It is the type of dialogue that I am in need of at this point in my life, post-baby and post-toddler. I now have time and I wnat to devote a portion of that time to improving my marriage and our intimate relationship. I love the podcasts. Thank you so much. I especially love when you read emails or questions from readers. Often people ask the same questions that I am wondering about.
Thank you again for your work and your service.
Subject:
The kissing couple
Date:
February 8 2010
Comments:
We received your book as a wedding gift, and read it on the drive home (from Utah to Colorado). The book helped us out with things that would have been a problem if we hadn't read about them in the book. We're still called the kissing couple at church, and we go on dates every week. He's my best friend and I love him so very much, I don't miss a chance to tell him.
Subject:
In response to the "Tiger Woods" post on Feb 3, 2010
Date:
February 3 2010
Name:
Laura M. Brotherson
Comments:
You are right on the money with your comments about Tiger Woods. At the time of recording the show my focus was not on sex addiction. Tiger's situation prompted me to address the topic of infidelity in general. You are correct that a separate episode would be needed to address the complex issue of sexual addiction. Addictions change everything. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts on this important matter.
Subject:
Tiger Woods
Date:
February 3 2010
Comments:
After listening to the broadcast on "Tiger Woods,"I found the tips on "affair proofing" your marriage in response to his infidelity, things we can all do, very distressing. In and of themselves the tips are helpful and wise, but as prevention for something as extreme as the Tiger Woods case, it is just missing the mark, he is a full blown sex addict, date night and communication are not going to affair proof your marriage if that is the person you are dealing with and these days there are a lot of those men walking down ailses with a slew of lies about who they really are! I did not find the counsel to see what we can do so this wouldn't happen to our marriages appropriate at all. Why? Because it almost sounds like "blaming the victim.' (the woman or in this case, Tiger's wife) What your broadcast fails to recognize is that a woman married to a person with less than honest intentions when he entered marriage, but who is a good lier (Tiger) is not going to get anywhere with what you recommend. There is no way Tiger would have changed his addiction if his wife had "tried harder." It took a national media expose to get him to admit what he did was wrong. Your advice is for couples who are seeking mutuality and openness, many men are not. SOme of this sex addict stuff is very subconscious and I'm not sure if you are aware but in situations of mildly abusive relationships, the experts in Domestic Violence centers warn to NOT seek marriage counseling! This is because marriage counseling presupposes an intention and desire for mutuality. Many men are not seeking mutuality at all but are seeking control and what these men who finally agree to marriage counseling get from it, is a bag of jargon and insights to manipulate and use to further their controlling position. This is true. If Tiger Woods were not such a public figure his lack of desire for true commitment and fidelity would have left him without motivation for change. ANd that is the case with many average less high profile cases. The answer is not to teach women in that case to do more to gain closeness, it's to get educated on sexual addictions and the illness that it is to decide if you can do what it takes to get out or get healthy together. I love your book and I love the truth and ideals it holds up as a standard, but what I am saying is, unless the man involved desires to live that high a law of love, then these extremes will not be prevented by the type of openness you recommend because that man is not remotely interested in it. One more thing, sex additions and control issues are huge problems and I fear only getting worse with the rising generation. I think it would be wise to teach women the signs of living with a lying sex addict as much as the up side of how to lovingly prevent it becasue it is a complex topic and your advice could be disasterous for someone in Tiger's wife's shoes who didn't have the support of the media.
Subject:
I had no idea what I didn't know
Date:
February 1 2010
Comments:
I have to tell you that I have had a few books change my life this last year, and the book And They Were Not Ashamed is one of them! I cannot even put into words what it has done for us. Thank you for being inspired to put these words into print. I believe that everything happens for a reason and we have things come into our lives at a time when we will truly accept them. I don’t know if I would’ve accepted this before now, but it is hitting me so poignantly now and I’m absorbing it like a sponge. I do have the sense that if I would’ve read this earlier maybe we could’ve had some things happen differently, but I just don’t know. I will take it now and be grateful it came into my lap at this time, obviously for a reason. More important than any of this, my husband is loving it. He can sense that I feel so freed and light-hearted from these learnings. I consider myself pretty smart, w/ multiple degrees and such, but man I had no idea what I DIDN’t know. Boy, was I missing out! Absolutely amazing!!!
Subject:
Helping out my girlfriends!
Date:
February 1 2010
Name:
Audrey
Comments:
Are you doing marriage/family therapy yet? I’ve been anxious to refer my friends! I have talked with so many girlfriends about things and have found that more than not they are frustrated, with no libido. Many absolutely dread sex, and their poor husbands are starving!!! I’ve had several friends tell me that they wish there was some sort of therapist that could help them. I always tell them that they are not alone and that I know exactly how they feel. (I DO know exactly how they feel. I've learned though that this is one thing I will never be selfish about because I want my husband to be happy and healthy and my marriage to be strong and alive.) Then I always refer them to your website and book!! (And of course I always proudly tell them that I know you personally. Hehe) And I will have you know that it IS because of your book, as well as a few other things (classes) and some girlfriends’ moral support and influence that have led me to the point of view that I live by today... Strengthening marriage through sexual intimacy!!
I think I helped one of my friends save her rocky marriage a few years ago. I also recently I took a few of my girlfriends “shopping” and got them going on being creative and having a changed point of view on sexual fulfillment in their marriages. (Their husbands were also pretty pumped!) Haha. Anyway, I guess, as a wife and as a woman amongst other married girlfriends, I want to be an advocate to help inspire them to understand what a powerful tool sexual intimacy is for a strong, sturdy, happy marriage. I believe so strongly in it!!!! And it’s amazing and sad to see how many of my friends are stuck in the “Good Girl” syndrome trap. I LOVE watching them get so excited and inspired to just relax, be creative, and go strengthen their marriages. My husband and I have a “box” up on our closet shelf that has all our “goodies” inside, like aroma therapy massaging oils, candles, music, some idea books, feather boa, fun creams, a couple games, blindfold, etc. (A couple girlfriends of mine got me started...!) Girlfriends can be such a strength and advocate for each other if they are willing to talk about it!!
Subject:
Great online show
Date:
January 30 2010
Name:
Dr. G
Comments:
I've been sending my clients to listen to your online shows, with great success I might add. Congratulations!
Subject:
Your book is awesome!
Date:
January 5 2010
Comments:
I finally got your book and have been eating it up! I've never suffered from "good girl syndrome" but the parts about touch have totally struck a chord with me. I am so anti-touch a lot, not just with my husband, but ANYONE and your book is really helping me out. Some day I hope my husband and I can go on one of your couples cruises - it would be so fun! I just wanted you to know your book is making a difference over here!
Subject:
The story about a man's "Involuntary Celibacy"
Date:
January 3 2010
Name:
Gary Pharis
Comments:
I was particularly impacted by Laura's sharing the story of a man who described his situation in marriage as "involuntary celibacy". I feel like I can relate to his story however the man in the story has much more integrity and has much more mature response to the absence of sexual intimacy with his marriage than I do. But he was very accurate in describing how a man feels within a marriage relationship where there is an absence of sexual intimacy. Despite a hopeless situation this man shows tremendous hope and trust in God to heal.
Subject:
Newlyweds
Date:
December 7 2009
Comments:
My husband and I received this book as a wedding gift. It has been so wonderful as we are just starting out on our journey together, and I'm sure will be just as valuable in years to come! I recommend this as a gift to ANY newlyweds and have already let other recently married friends borrow it. I also loved how in it we are encouraged to talk to each other about this, such a wonderful book!
