"Straight Talk about Strengthening Marriage!" |
e-Newsletter #16 -- January
30, 2006 (#06-1)
** CONTENTS **
1~ MARRIAGE TIP -- "Romancing Your Valentine!"
* (Win a
Romantic Getaway to the Anniversary
2~ ARTICLES -- "The Greatest Gift You Can Give Your Children"
3~ EVENTS -- Women's Health
Conf; BYU-Idaho Education Week; BYU
Campus Education Week; Couples W.
Caribbean Cruise (Feb '07)
4~ NEWS -- (1) Phone Consultations; (2) Send Us Your Couples Photos
and WIN!; (3) Valentine's Day Specials
REVIEWS -- "One of the
best books I have ever read"
6~ STRAIGHT TALK Q&A -- He needs it, and I
7~ WORDS TO PONDER -- Love is friendship on fire
8~ MARRIAGE NEWS -- Making Marriage Like Work; Sex Calms Nerves
1~ MARRIAGE TIP --
2~ ARTICLE -- "The Greatest Gift You Can Give Your Children"
Romancing your sweetheart is a
great way to keep the flame glowing brightly
in your marriage. A little
playfulness and creativity adds vitality to your
intimate relationship, keeping lovemaking fresh
and new. It will touch every
aspect of your life. What are
some ways you can put a
sparkle in your
and soul this Valentine's Day? Get
flowing with some of these fun ideas:
~ Add music
new music) to your
intimate encounters. Create
Engage in some
pillow talk to brainstorm additional ways you can both add
your own special collection of bedroom music.
~ Gift wrap yourself in
attire to nourish the visual
nature of your husband and increase your sensual feelings as well.
to your intimate collection regularly to keep things new and
~ Reserve special silky bedding
~ Change the
new! If you usually begin
clothed, begin unclothed
instead; if you usually begin unclothed, try
undressing each other first. Try different positions.
~ Make love with more light or
~ Try a new time of day
relations. Surprise yourself and
your spouse by inviting him/her home for a lunchtime rendezvous.
not only be adding variety to your intimate life, but also be
fulfilling your spouse's fantasies at the same time!
~ Try a new location.
doesn’t have to
always be in the bedroom.
Spread a blanket on the bedroom closet floor. Try the office (make
you lock the door!). Shower or take a Jacuzzi bath together.
~ Use colored light bulbs
in your bedroom
lamp for a sensual
~ Use scented candles.
of delicious candles on hand.
~ Wear perfume or cologne.
~ Stretch yourself to “gift”
with something you know
your spouse would like. You may be surprised at your spouse’s
willingness to “gift” you with your heart’s desires in return.
~ Schedule regular overnight
Our favorite place is the
Anniversary Inn (located in Utah and Idaho).
You've just got to see
their incredible, romantic, themed rooms. Whether you choose the
"Enchanted Forest" or the "Romeo and
Juliet" suite, you'll escape
into another world where you
can relax in your own jetted tub and
bask in the romance and delight. Check out each of the suites by
going online at: http://www.anniversaryinn.com.
*** WIN A ROMANTIC GETAWAY *** One lucky
receive a free one-night stay at the Anniversary Inn of their
choice, in the room of their choice! Enjoy complimentary
cheesecake, sparkling cider, and freshly baked breakfast
delivered to your door. To enter the drawing, send us your
favorite couples photo by Febuary 28th (see "Couples Photos"
under the "News" section below for more information). The
winning couple will be drawn and notified the beginning of
more variety and vitality to your love and lovemaking. So much
pleasure exists within God’s ordained realm of sexual
relations in marriage.
(From Chapter 6 of the book, "And They Were Not Ashamed--
Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment")
To read past articles, visit our
web page at:
Check out Laura's latest magazine article on the greatest gift we can
"The Greatest Gift You Can Give Your Children"
by Laura M. Brotherson, CFLE, Meridian Magazine,
December 28, 2005
also available at DeseretBook.com, January 17, 2006
One of the best gifts we can give our children is a mother and
love each other. Parents who maintain a strong and vibrant
marriage set a
positive example of the inevitable ups and downs of
marriage, while also
showing that problems can be worked through. This
creates a haven of
security and well-being from which children can
3~ AUTHOR EVENTS --
Women's Health Conf; BYU-Idaho Ed Week;
BYU Campus Ed Week; Couples W. Caribbean Cruise (Feb '07)
"Women in Motion" Health Conference
Saturday, March 18, 2006, 9 - 5:30 p.m. (Delta, Utah)
~ "Good Girls
Other Intimate Inhibitors
~ "Sexy is a
Mind--Cultivating Intimate Desire for Your Spouse"
Register online before March 4
and receive $20 off: http://www.wim-ut.com/
BYU Idaho Education Week
June 29 - July 1, 2006 (Rexburg, Idaho)
Presentation Series Title: "Straight Talk about Strengthening Marriage"
BYU Campus Education Week
August 21 - 25, 2006, BYU Campus (Provo, Utah)
Presentation Series Title: "Understanding the Intricacies of ONEness in
Valentine’s Day Week -- Couples W. Caribbean Cruise
February 10-17, 2007 (Leaving from Galveston, TX)
Headliner -- Laura M. Brotherson, CFLE, Author of "And They Were
If you missed out on joining us for this year's Couples Cruise
to the E.
Caribbean, you can plan now to join us for next year's
Couples Cruise to the
W. Caribbean! Make it an annual marriage
celebration tradition to join us for
this Valentine's Day Week Cruise.
~ Prices start at $857 per person
To be a part of this group call Cruise Planners at 801-446-4218 or
For additional information about each of these events, visit our
4~ NEWS -- (1) Phone Consultations; (2)
Your Couples Photos
Valentine's Day Specials
We are excited to announce the availability of phone
individuals and couples! I apologize that I have yet to respond to
people who have emailed me with questions. My intention in
consultations available is to more quickly and effectively
respond, within my
time constraints, to the desire that exists for
additional information on the
delicate and sacred aspects of marital
intimacy. Speaking is easier and
quicker than writing, so I hope to be
able to respond to all who would like
further discussion on any aspect
of the intimate/sexual relationship within
Individuals and couples have few options in
seeking helpful, personal
assistance with creating a healthy intimate
relationship in their marriage.
By providing phone consultations I hope
to address this vital need.
Here's what one couple had to say:
"My wife and I think your
phone consultations are a great idea! Your
For more information and to schedule a
half-hour consultation for $55 visit:
book was the best we've ever
read, but there's just no way the book
could compare to our four phone
visits with you where we've been
able to discuss personal issues and
solutions. You've really helped
us! In our conversations you've been
discreet and sensitive, yet also
open and frank. We appreciated how you
immediately put us at ease
by your laugh and saying, "Don't worry,
there's nothing you're going
to ask that will embarrass me, or that I
haven't heard before!" It's
nice to know we're talking with someone so
professional that we can
trust to keep things confidential, and who has
incorporated our values and beliefs. You are filling a
huge void, so
that couples have a place to go for help on this crucial
think you are the best thing that's come along since sliced
--H.B. and J.B., St. George, UT
Send Us Your
Photos -- and Win a Romantic Getaway!
We've received lots of great couples photos, but we
you to send in your favorite photo as well. One lucky
couple will be drawn to
receive a romantic getaway to the Anniversary Inn, so grab a digital
or get a special couples
portrait taken for this upcoming Valentine's Day.
This could be a
great activity for you and your spouse to have a husband/wife
especially if you don't have many pictures of just you two.
Send us your favorite one to
be posted on our
website as a special
celebration of your marriage!
(Send it by February 28th to
be included in the drawing.) We want to continue to build a
Marriage" showcase of
loving couples to highlight the
marital unit as the
crucial component of the family and society.
Send your photo with your
first names, and how many years you've been
married to: firstname.lastname@example.org.
You can check
out the "Couples Photos" page here:
(3) Valentine's Day Special Prices
and enjoy special savings for you and your
sweetheart. Take advantage of our Valentine's Day discount prices on
book and/or audio book, "And
They Were Not
Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment"--makes a great Valentine's Day
(Special pricing available when ordering
CD Audio book
(12 CDs) $29.95
To stay current on "What's New" on the StrengtheningMarriage.com
5~ READER'S REVIEWS
-- "One of the best books I have ever read"
"Laura Brotherson's book "And
They Were Not Ashamed" is one of
We welcome you to share your thoughts
about the book "And They Were
the best books I have ever read. Laura
takes on the sensitive, yet
crucial topic of marital intimacy with
great reverence and candor using
gospel principles and Christian-based
teachings. No other book
(apart from the scriptures) in my memory has
had such an impact
on my life. Though written especially for women,
this book is equally
as informative and helpful for husbands to help
understand the intimate needs and concerns of their wives
needs and the female sexual response). Men can also benefit
learning to overcome their own inhibitions and misunderstandings
about sex. Read it together as a couple! Laura's book covers not
physical intimacy, but emotional and spiritual as well. It also
discusses the great importance of teaching our children correct
principles about sex and how to go about teaching them. I highly
recommend this book to all married couples and those planning for
marriage. It really will turn your intimate life as a couple around and
bring you much closer together."
Not Ashamed" at: www.strengtheningmarriage.com/comments.php.
6~ STRAIGHT TALK Q&A -- He needs it, and I don't
My husband and I have been married for over 20 years. I love my
dearly, but we have hit a bump in the road in regards to our
sex life, and I
don't know how to fix it. We regularly disagree about
how often he needs
"it" and I don't. We have tried talking it out, but
the issue never seems to
get resolved. I know there are other things in
our relationship that hinder
this process, so I am at my wits end as to
how to help us through this.
Can you help, or direct me to someone?
Sexual issues are
generally rooted in complex,
of the marriage. My
first suggestion is to read the book "And
Not Ashamed--Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment" together,
possible (or read it separately, if you can't do it together). Begin
homework suggestions, applying the principles with
a focus on yourself
NOT on your spouse. (Remember you can only change
yourself.) This book
addresses all dimensions of the intimate relationship--the emotional,
physical/sexual--with homework to help you get to the roots
of the issues. This is
certainly a common dilemma of "he
"she wants less." You are not alone.
Secondly I would suggest checking with some local counselors who might
be able to help you through these challenges. You can contact your
LDS Family Services office or
search for counselors at www.AMCAP.net.
You can also use the American
Association of Marriage and Family
Therapists (AAMFT) therapist
a list of marriage
your area (http://www.therapistlocator.net/therapistlocator/index.asp).
recommend checking out the Marriage Friendly Therapists Registry
to be sure you find a marriage
counselor that is
pro-marriage and pro-commitment. Not all marriage
created equal. You want a counselor that is most likely to
succeed at marriage, rather than one who will merely help you get
when the going gets tough.
Call around to some of the counselors until
you find a good fit. See the
Appendix in my book for other suggestions on how to find a good
You'll find some questions to ask the therapists to "interview" them to
the right one for you. Be prayerful about finding one who can help
and you'll find them.
I think you'll begin to better understand the dynamics at play in your
relationship, as you'll read our book and begin to apply the
much to address in a brief email here, but I believe you'll be
touched by the
things that will be most helpful for your relationship.
Know that happiness
and mutual enjoyment in marriage is possible, and
is waiting for you!
To check out other questions and answers visit our Q&A webpage
7~ WORDS TO PONDER --
is friendship on fire
"Love is friendship
8~ MARRIAGE NEWS -- Making Marriage Like Work;
Sex Calms Nerves
"Marriage News" is a new feature being added to this strengthening
newsletter to share some of today's latest insights and
marriage-related topics. We hope you enjoy keeping
current with the latest
Making Marriage (Like) Work
Author Says Men Can Succeed by Treating It
Like a Job
By Craig Stoltz, Washington Post Staff
Writer, Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Scott Haltzman, a psychiatrist and Brown
University professor, has been
studying marriages good and bad for a
long time, both in his clinical work
and via his Web site,
. His new book,
"The Secrets of
Happily Married Men" (Jossey-Bass, 2006), collects what
he says are the
guy behaviors that lead to happy marriage. As his Web
site says, he's
"out to save marriages, one husband at a time."
...Anyway, following are the eight guy
"secrets" Haltzman shares:
1. Make Marriage Your Job.
2. Know Your Wife.
3. Be Home Now.
4. Expect Conflict; Deal With It.
5. Learn to Listen.
6. Aim to Please.
7. Understand the Truth About Sex.
8. Introduce yourself.
To read the entire article
(copy and paste link without any spaces/breaks
into web browser):
Sex Calms Nerves before Public Speaking
- study Wed Jan 25, 2:26 PM ET
LONDON (Reuters) Stuart Brody, a psychologist at the University of
in Scotland, studied nearly 50 men and women who recorded their
activities for two weeks and analyzed its impact on their blood
levels when under acute stress, such as when giving a speech.
discovered that the volunteers who had sexual intercourse were
stressed..."The effects are not attributable simply to the
afforded by orgasm but rather, endure for at least a
week," Brody told New
Scientist magazine. He believes that the release
of the so-called "pair
bonding" hormone oxytocin might explain the
To read the entire story:
Stay tuned for more intimacy insights in upcoming Strengthening
Newsletters...! Visit the e-Newsletter archive at:
If you missed the last few newsletters, you can catch up here:
"Being Sexual Best Friends"
-- Newsltr #15
"Secrets of the
Response" -- Newsltr #14
"Straight Talk about
Strengthening Marriage" is an electronic
designed to bless lives, strengthen marriages, and build strong
written by the author
of the book "And They Were Not Ashamed —
Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment." Visit
for excerpts and articles, or to place an order.
The author welcomes
your feedback at Laura@StrengtheningMarriage.com
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